“Haista paskaa, sä saatana homo!”

A Finnish-Swedish colleague, Doggy, had gotten a fare near Matinkylä, southern Espoo to a private house.

He got there but because it was dark outside, he didn’t see the numbers on the houses. So he kept driving back and forth on the street to find the client and the right house.

Finally an old hag dragged herself out of a yard, waved to Doggy and yelled: “Damn it, come here!”

When she got on the car, straight away she started an “enthusiastic” conversation with Doggy: “Stop the meter! I won’t pay you anything for driving back and forth! I won’t pay you at all!” Doggy, calm and collected as he is, absorbed this speech like a champ and told the queen: “Easy there, ma’am. The meter isn’t even running yet.” The woman then relented and said: “Oh, very well. I will drive with you then. Take me to Sports.” It’s a sports bar in Matinkylä, where I have picked up “interesting” clients myself.

Doggy started driving. After a minute she started screaming again: “Wow, does your meter go or what? We just started driving and it’s already showing 9 euros!” Doggy then told the client: “Of course it’s showing that, it’s after 8pm and the cost of starting a drive is 8.80.” She kept at it: “I’m not paying for this drive!”

Hearing that, Doggy stopped the car in the middle of the street, about 300m before the bar and asked her: “Are you paying or not?” “No,” the biddy answered and tried to exit the car and flee.

As she was in a hurry, her foot got stuck between the seat and the floor of the car – her shoe came off and fell back into the car. She wasn’t discouraged though – she went across street walking in a hurry, towards the bar when she suddenly changed her mind. She turned around and came back to the taxi. In addition to getting her shoe back she had something important say to Doggy. The Finnish gal yelled to the Finnish-Swedish Doggy: “Haista paskaa, sä saatana homo!” At the same time she grabbed her shoe from the car and limped away, even her skirt was on crooked.

Doggy then cancelled the fare and drove off.

Haista paskaa, sä saatana homo! – “Go f*ck yourself you f*cking fag!” in Finnish slang.


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